Every single moment of every single day I bear witness to Mother/Daughter relationships.
Mine. My brides. My team.
I exist in the space between the maternity ward and the undertakers. “Hatch. Match. Dispatch.” Like a bridal doula, I see my purpose as providing emotional, physical and expert support through one of life’s big transitions.
My career is maternal; sometimes caring, nurturing, embracing. Sometimes it is more, “you are NOT going out dressed like that.”
I see the love, the antagonism, the good, the bad and the saintly aspects of motherhood. I bear witness to the family transitions; I see the shifting relationship balances. I see the joy of a shared experiences. And the pain of an absent Mother
On Being a Mother.
Motherhood is something I craved worse than any addiction. I was lucky to have three beautiful people that I managed to bring to adulthood. They are extraordinary, talented, loving and cracked enough to allow their brilliance to shine. Am I enough? One parent trying to be two. Father and commander…
On Being a Daughter.
I made you go home from The Chapel last week, telling you, even though you think you are as strong as an Ox, that you are 84 and vulnerable. I can’t even imagine a world without you. As much as we swear and shout at each other, who would dare tell me off if you weren’t here? You are not sacked, hopefully saved x
This is the strangest Mother’s Day of my life. It isn’t even that we had family plans. I was planning to take my work children to London, the hotel was booked - and is still paid for - to buy the 2021 collections from Anna Kara and Suzanne Neville.
Instead today my daughter is in London. My Mum is isolating. I spent a good amount of time on the phone yesterday to Team Neville strategising our shared futures.
Last night, at home, I eavesdropped. From my adhoc office I could hear that there are zero plans for today, ‘Mother’s Day.’ My mini family – the current micro gang of three – is how it needs to be.
Anything you think I have to offer – as a Mum, a friend or a business owner – comes from a 70s, upbringing of seclusion, a lack of means and an addiction to the written word. If we can stay safe, and this is your new normal, it isn’t all bad.
Happy Mother’s Day. Matriarchs and Maternalism for the win.
Emma x
Photography by Solstock for Getty Images